I actually subscribed yesterday, because the "following the rules" paradigm has been sending me over the edge for years now. Whether it's rationalizing the shooting of black citizens or the rape of a woman, it's ALWAYS framed as some character assassination...some "gotcha" moment because the murdered/abused/raped/impacted individual isn't toeing some invisible line (mind you, I'm a rule follower by nature). In the cases of Wayne Couzens and Woody Allen, we are redirected away from them and re-centered on the women or children again and again, as if men are what? The weather? An act of god? A natural disaster? When you posted this on Twitter, I see again, women and men talking about taking self-defense classes and using guns, reframing this as a lack of Sarah's preparation, as if that could have prevented her murder. I also blame our reliance on gross passive language which removes the perpetrators out of the equation and again focuses on the victim. There has to be a way to get away from this and still be unbiased.
When men on Twitter (famous ones, usually) use the "as a father/son/brother (to girls/women)" in their oh-so-brave stance against misogyny or violence against women, you know we haven't come very far in 2021.
When I lived in London, I once locked myself out, and it was dark out and there was no place to wait except a pub, and I didn't have enough money to go there, and I didn't drink or smoke and thought it would be hell to be there. So I found the local police station and asked if I could use their phone to call my place until one of my roommates got home. They were polite and let me do this, and I got home fine. But when I told some friends what I did, they were horrified. They told me NEVER EVER go to the police and tell them you're all alone and can't get into your apartment or whatever because who knows what they might do to me.
The Woody Allen documentary is so infuriating. I remember as a little kid hearing about this and not understanding why it was okay. But my mom was always very clear that even if he didn’t go to jail, he was a bad man. I have never forgotten but my rage feels fresh. I think this article hits a lot of why that is.
I actually subscribed yesterday, because the "following the rules" paradigm has been sending me over the edge for years now. Whether it's rationalizing the shooting of black citizens or the rape of a woman, it's ALWAYS framed as some character assassination...some "gotcha" moment because the murdered/abused/raped/impacted individual isn't toeing some invisible line (mind you, I'm a rule follower by nature). In the cases of Wayne Couzens and Woody Allen, we are redirected away from them and re-centered on the women or children again and again, as if men are what? The weather? An act of god? A natural disaster? When you posted this on Twitter, I see again, women and men talking about taking self-defense classes and using guns, reframing this as a lack of Sarah's preparation, as if that could have prevented her murder. I also blame our reliance on gross passive language which removes the perpetrators out of the equation and again focuses on the victim. There has to be a way to get away from this and still be unbiased.
When men on Twitter (famous ones, usually) use the "as a father/son/brother (to girls/women)" in their oh-so-brave stance against misogyny or violence against women, you know we haven't come very far in 2021.
'The real question is: Do they want to?'
Ultimately that's the only pertinent question and the answer is as depressing as it is inevitable:
Obviously not enough.
When I lived in London, I once locked myself out, and it was dark out and there was no place to wait except a pub, and I didn't have enough money to go there, and I didn't drink or smoke and thought it would be hell to be there. So I found the local police station and asked if I could use their phone to call my place until one of my roommates got home. They were polite and let me do this, and I got home fine. But when I told some friends what I did, they were horrified. They told me NEVER EVER go to the police and tell them you're all alone and can't get into your apartment or whatever because who knows what they might do to me.
So, yeah, I guess you're not safe anywhere.
The Woody Allen documentary is so infuriating. I remember as a little kid hearing about this and not understanding why it was okay. But my mom was always very clear that even if he didn’t go to jail, he was a bad man. I have never forgotten but my rage feels fresh. I think this article hits a lot of why that is.