If you thought the gender divide was bad before, you haven’t seen anything yet. Donald Trump’s win this week, bolstered by online shitposters and billionaire misogynists, has shifted something fundamental in young women. And while we’ll see plenty of ink spilled in election post-mortems about the online radicalization of young white men—as there should be—it would be a mistake to miss the story of how this election is doing something similar to their female counterparts.
Over the last two days, I’ve watched as young women’s TikToks and social media posts went from inconsolable shock to pure, hot rage. I saw in real time as those in their teens and 20s—some of whom voted for the first time—realized the depths of their country’s disdain for them.
For those of us in middle age or older, there wasn’t anything revelatory about the election; we’ve lived that betrayal for years. But to understand for the first time that America would rather elect a rapist than a woman is soul-crushing. Even worse: Realizing just how many men voted for Trump not in spite of his sexual predation—but because of it.
As difficult as that epiphany is to bear, it did not take long for this younger generation of women to respond with a resounding fuck that and fuck you. Notably, their anger isn’t at the world at large, but pointedly focused:
“If men thought I was mean to them before this, then they really aren’t gonna like me now.”
“Switching teams from annoying feminist to evil misandrist after the election.”
“Get ready for me to become the most unbearable woman you’ll ever meet.”
And then there’s this: In the hours after Trump was elected, Google search term interest in the ‘4B movement’ spiked—that’s a South Korean feminist term for women who swear off sex, marriage and childbirth with men.
I don’t think that’s a passing fad or empty threat.
Even before Roe was overturned, American women were getting married later and less. Knowing that so many of their male cohort voted for the serial abuser who stripped them of their rights isn’t likely to reverse this trend.
And let’s be clear: It’s not women who will suffer as a result of any Lysistrata-type protest.
For as much as American culture paints young women as marriage-crazed and desperate to land a man, the truth is that it’s actually men who want a wife and family. While only 45% of young women want to be mothers, 57% of young men want the same. And while young men are in the midst of a loneliness epidemic—with more than 60% of them single—the majority of single women have taken themselves off the dating market entirely. In part, it’s because of how common it is to be harassed on dates.
And that’s the thing. Women aren’t opting out of relationships with men simply because they’ve gained political power, financial independence and the ability to create full lives on their own. It’s men’s bad behavior driving them away.
This is a generation of young women who grew up online, seeped in a world of social media misogyny and trolls who comment on their bodies and demand they “make me a sandwich.” And that’s on top of getting the same lessons that women my age did—told to watch what you wear, when you walk, and who you trust.
So I have to imagine that after a lifetime of being expected to eat shit, waking up on Wednesday morning knowing that the men in your lives voted away your humanity made the decision to leave them behind pretty easy.
Especially considering how many took the mask off immediately after the election was called: Since Tuesday, young men have flooded women’s mentions with “your body, my choice”—a phrase that some even started shouting at little girls at school just a day later.
It’s that Republican-enabled impunity that will keep young women furious. Why put up with even a minute of it?
When conservatives started to panic about marriage and birthrates, they had the opportunity to make it more appealing for women to get married and have children. They could have fought for paid parental leave, subsidized childcare and taught men to be better partners. But in Christian patriarchy, men are never wrong and they certainly never need to change. Better to let misogyny run amok than give women an iota of respect.
The truth is that men—young and old—are terrified: They’re afraid of being alone, afraid of losing power, and afraid that they have no idea who they are if they can’t subjugate women.
That’s why as despairing as I feel about the election, I have hope. Because few things are more powerful than a nation of furious, free young women.
Yes to all of this..and I’m furious at 53% of white women who voted for Trump.
I’m from Alabama and went to University of Alabama. I’ve been unfollowing all of my bitch sorority sisters that voted for Trump. They voted against their interests, mine, and our future’s. Fuck them all. I got a few jabs in on some of them on my way out the fucking door, as they were posting misinformation about women’s healthcare. You know, about “exceptions” for the life of the mother. I couldn’t let that fucking slide. Thank you for equipping us with knowledge every day.