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Patricia Eddishaw's avatar

agreed.

I'm 80 years old, been fighting this crap for 60 years. No amount of "explaining" makes a damn bit of difference.

Two things happened to me on Twitter today. Two men, on the opposite ends of the intellectual spectrum, both equally clueless and useless.

One was a male Washington Post correspondent opining intellectually about whether we should put all our Democratic energy into the Abortion Issue. "What about job growth?" he asks. Women start replying WTF? I finally ask, "why should I care about job opportunities if I am constantly pregnant. None of those great jobs are remotely available to me if I'm pregnant - or perceived to be at risk of pregnancy" The fact is that, for women, the Abortion Issue goes far beyond the physical act of Abortion. It is literally about us being able to live our lives and support ourselves and our families.

The man just doesn't get it. For him, it was *only* about this one relatively small, unrelated issue.

A little later I'm on another twitter thread about babies, diapers and formula - nothing to do with abortion. I casually mention something about struggling as a young mother with laundromats and diapers. This guy jumps on and apparently assumes I was an unwed mother irresponsibly birthing babies I couldn't afford. He tells me blatantly I should not have had sex if I couldn't have afforded children. I start answering back that no, in fact my husband and I were Grad School IT professionals who hit a horrendous medical emergency event and were temporarily struggling financially.

And then I realize WTF, it's not even that this second guy, Diaper Man, "just doesn't get it." He doesn't even WANT to "get it". What he WANTS is to label me as an irresponsible slut who should have "just kept her legs shut".

So yeah, I'm done. We've tried for 60 plus years to get people, mainly men, to understand. We try to explain, find common ground, provide perspective. It DOES NOT WORK. We need to stop TALKING and start DOING whatever it takes TO WIN. Maybe the other side will eventually start to understand and will move to join us. At this point, I frankly don't care; I just want them out of my way.

I'm not worried. I'm secure enough in my moral baseline that I trust I won't cross it.

But the ethereal mythical intellectual HIgh Ground? It's useless. It's time to fight.

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Rena's avatar

A funny thing happened yesterday. I moved from numb to bed. I literally felt the fearangerhatesadness in my body. I slept for 3 hours, freezing cold, could not get warm. Woke up and said, time to take action. I did a covid test and I'm fine. My body just. could. not. take. it. Today I posted emilyslist on facebook, I posted the speech I gave to students in 2004 about the urgency for voting specifically about SCOTUS and abortion, and I'm revving up again. It's a roller coaster, this lifetime of social justice. I am weary. I am beaten down. I will never give up.

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